We’re all pretty fluent in human body language. We know when someone’s giving us the cold shoulder, looking quizzically, folding their arms to form a barrier showing resistance to what we’re saying. It’s all part of our rich communication skills.
But what if we had no speech? What if this were the only way we could communicate?
That’s where dogs find themselves!
Your puppy arrives with you, a few weeks old, with little idea what these great lumbering creatures of another species are doing with him.
He has no idea how to communicate!
So he’ll try barking; flattening himself on the floor; running away; jumping up; trying to play inappropriately (e.g. with your trouserlegs). Eventually, if all he gets is shouting or punishment*** in response, he’ll resort to snarling. This means he’s frightened of you! He may feel he needs to get in first with a snap in order to stop you doing whatever it is you’re doing.
*** By “punishment” I’m not suggesting you’re beating your dog with a stick! Punishment means anything that is unpleasant - so it could be ignoring, yelling, confiscation, banishment, pushing or pulling ..
Sometimes, the puppy has found this is the only way to get attention from you.
This is a sad state of affairs, and one which many new puppy-owners find themselves in. They mistakenly think they need to discipline their puppy.
Do you discipline a newborn baby? Of course you don’t! You lavish her with love and affection, studying her all the time to find out her needs and wishes.
Disciplining a puppy is confrontational. That is not what you want with anyone you’re trying to build a relationship with.
So this is where the sensitive owner needs to step in and make it clear what communication works and what doesn’t.
Get the basics down first
The first thing to do is establish some basics:
A proper housetraining program is in operation. Get your free Cheatsheet for Errorless Housetraining here
Your puppy is getting all the sleep he needs, in a dedicated place where he cannot be disturbed.
YOU are getting all the sleep YOU need!
Your puppy is getting high-quality food in sufficient quantity at the right amount for his age
It always amazes me how many new dog-owners have no idea about these points. But if they aren’t met, you have little hope with the next part!
Sensitivity and understanding
Now you need to watch your dog like a scientist would.
🐾 What is he doing when?
🐾 Why is he doing it?
Take your personal feelings right out of the equation. This is not about you! It’s about a tiny creature of another species, who has found himself in a strange new world with people who don’t seem to understand him.
So if he does something you don’t like, don’t take it personally! Ask yourself what the reason may be for this.
A. Is he overtired? (HINT: this is normally the first reason for puppy “misbehaviour”, just as it is for toddlers.)
B. Is he hungry?
C. Is he bored?
D. Is this the fastest way for him to get your attention?
E. Are you telling him off for breaking some rule he does not know exists?
Start learning exactly what is going on, how your puppy is acting just before he does the thing you don’t want, then look for a way to change this without punishment, force, intimidation, or shouting.
Just as with that toddler, usually all that’s needed is to attend to one of the basics listed above. Once all those boxes are ticked, you can move on to distracting him with something interesting (movement, food, toy, outside) and teaching him how to play the way you’d like it - with toys and not your hands.
So what’s with the Dog Body Language?
To help you understand exactly what you are seeing - as you watch your puppy as a scientist would - have a look at this video which gives you a quick guide to how dogs express themselves.
So often people misunderstand what their dog is saying! They anthropomorphise their actions, ascribing motives where there are none.
Honestly, dogs just want a comfy billet and a quiet life. Is that what your new dog is getting with you?
