Want to Know the Secret to Mobilising your Happy Hormone? (This may surprise you)

Is it going to the gym? (that’s a no from many people.)
Taking meds? (one pill can lead to another …)
Reading self-help books? (good stuff, but gives you a lot of work to do!)

No! it’s easier than all that.

It may surprise you to know that what has been proven to improve your life - your happiness, your health, and even your longevity - is sharing your life with a dog. 

Not only is a dog proven to bring many good health effects - a dog is fun!

Of course, those of us who have shared most of our lives with dogs know this already.

Some may think that’s all sentimental nonsense. But no - here are some facts about the effects of living with a dog. 

Dogs - free healthcare for their people  

    •    Touching your dog - stroking, patting, or cuddling - lowers blood pressure and cortisol (the stress hormone) and increases oxytocin and dopamine (the feel-good hormones). 1 (see references below)

    •    Dog-owners recover much faster from major illnesses, both mental and physical. 2

    •    Dog-ownership protects women in particular from depression. 3

    •    You’ll see less of your doctor and have fewer sick days. 4

Even insurance companies may ask if you have a pet if you’re over 75. Now they’re speaking through their wallet, so they are convinced! 

  •    And here’s the big one: Just gazing into those lovely brown eyes* measurably increases oxytocin (the happy hormone) in the owner. 5
* This works just as well for Weimaraners’ green eyes and merle dogs’ blue eyes ;-)

Active steps to improve your life

We are told that the six pillars of a brain-healthy, Alzheimer’s-prevention lifestyle are:

    Regular exercise
    Healthy diet
    Mental stimulation
    Quality sleep
    Stress management
    An active social life  6

You can’t argue with those at any stage of life for all-round health and self-esteem. 

And how many can your pet dog help you with?  

All of ‘em!

Doctor Dog strikes again

    •    Your dog will get you out and about regularly - from forest trails to the local shops, from dog classes to dog sports, he’ll get you moving as well as introducing you to new friends and acquaintances. Consider a class on scentwork, for instance, which will open up your mind as well as being heaven for your dog.

    •    While you’re paying attention to what you feed your dog for his best health (don’t be seduced by the bag with the prettiest dog picture) you can pay attention to your own diet too. Check out this excellent site to learn more about dog foods and UK readers head over to claim three weeks' free home-cooked food 

    •    All this fresh air and getting out and about will give you an appetite and encourage deep sleep.

    •    Nurturing gives people a purpose and value: giving your pet time gives you time.

    •    Putting someone other than yourself first will stop you slipping down the road towards self-absorption, loneliness, misery and blame. 

    •    When you’re worried, turn to your dog for a quick dose of mood-elevating hormone, by stroking her or simply gazing into her eyes.

    •    Dogs live in the present - when nothing is required of them, they sleep:  their example is worth a good few meditation classes. You needn’t dwell in the past, live now!

    •    And before you start worrying about the children in your home, it’s been proven that babies growing up with a dog in the family are less likely to develop asthma. 7

All of this is from your average pet dog at home. That’s before we even look at the dog’s astonishing abilities in cancer detection, seizure alerts, hearing for deaf people, easing Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in veteran soldiers, and general assistance, to name but a few. 

By the way, you can teach your own dog to be your assistance dog! (Start by teaching her to bring her lead to you before a walk.)

But aren’t dogs difficult?

Dogs are straightforward - there is no hidden agenda. Contrary to what you may have seen on popular tv programmes, they have no wish to rule the world. They are not stubborn or self-willed. They value a warm bed and a full bowl and are keen to fit in with you.

Dogs respond best to reward-based interactions involving choice. What a simple and stress-free way to interact with anyone! There’s no need for you to become a drill sergeant, no need to have a battle of wills. You want this dog to lower your blood pressure, not elevate it!

Instead of barking, “Sit! Down! Stand on your head!” you can quietly say “What do you do when I pick up your lead?”  You’ll get the response you want (a sit, perhaps) and everyone is staying calm. 

For more understanding of Choice Training and how it can transform your life till it is bursting with happy hormones, read this post And here is a free starter email course about Choice Training

Treat your dog as you’d treat a young child in your family and just enjoy peace and harmony together.

And lots of gazing into those melting brown eyes.

_____________________________________________________________________

REFERENCES

1. Vet J. 2003 May;165(3):296-301.
    Neurophysiological correlates of affiliative behaviour between humans and dogs.
    Odendaal JS1, Meintjes RA.
    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12672376

    J Behav Med. 1988 Oct;11(5):509-17.
    Cardiovascular effects of human-pet dog interactions.
    Vormbrock JK1, Grossberg JM.
    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/3236382

2. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2854030/

3. Cline KM (2010). Psychological effects of dog ownership: role strain, role enhancement, and depression. J Soc Psychol. Mar-Apr;150(2):117-31.

4. Headey BW, Fu Na, Zheng R (2008). Pet Dogs Benefit Owners’ Health: A ‘Natural Experiment’ in China. Soc Indic Res. 87:481-493.
http://center4research.org/healthy-living-prevention/pets-and-health-the-impact-of-companion-animals

5. Horm Behav. 2009 Mar;55(3):434-41. doi: 10.1016/j.yhbeh.2008.12.002. Epub 2008     Dec 14.
    Dog's gaze at its owner increases owner's urinary oxytocin during social interaction.
    Nagasawa M1, Kikusui T, Onaka T, Ohta M.
    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19124024

6.  http://www.helpguide.org/articles/alzheimers-dementia/alzheimers-and-dementia-prevention.htm

7. http://archpedi.jamanetwork.com/article.aspx?articleid=2467334

Make life easy for you and your dog!

“Why are you carrying that lump of a child the whole time?” the woman asked of my friend Jessica. “He must be two if he’s a day. Where’s his pushchair?”

Jessica blushed and struggled on, hoisting her well-built two-year-old son onto her hip. She didn’t want to have to answer this sensible question. She was exhausted carrying the wriggly heavy child for hours, but she was under the thumb of her partner, who had decreed that no child of his would be put in a pushchair, and that his mother had to carry him whenever he could not walk. Apart from wearing out his mother who had no free hands for anything else, this prevented the child from interacting with his world without parental pressure. It blocked the path of discovery, self-awareness, confidence. 

This madness extended to the home, where the boy was not allowed to sleep in a cot. 

The result? Midnight mayhem. Whenever he awoke, Basil would - naturally enough - slide out of bed and start wandering. Naps were impossible if Basil decided he wasn’t sleepy enough. Result: unrested and overtired child - and all parents freeze with apprehension at the thought of that!

It’s hard enough bringing up a toddler, without both hands being tied behind your back.

Most parents would consider these attitudes lunacy - the result of Jessica’s spouse’s bullying. 

So why do people do the exact same thing with their dog?!

I’m always surprised when I come across resistance to using a crate for a dog. 

Using a crate for a dog is just the same as using a cot for a child.

There’s no question of punishment. The crate is his bed, his own space; it has plenty of toys and chews in it; all meals are fed in it; stuffed food toys are given in it. It’s a haven where he’s safe from other dogs, cats, children, the world. All he has to do in it is r-e-l-a-x. 

Here you see Coco Poodle relaxing in his much-loved crate. It even has a handle for him to pull to open it when he wants to go in for a break. 

You should always know exactly where your dog is. If you ask him to go in his crate when you go out, you’ll know that when you come back you’ll be greeted by a smiling, stretching, cool, rested puppy, with no chewed cables or furniture, no upturned bin, and no pee on the floor. Your pleasure at seeing each other will be genuine and untrammelled by recrimination, bad temper, and frustration. 

Leaving him loose to entertain himself in the house instead of getting his valuable shut-eye, will make you bad-tempered and cross, and your puppy will have NO idea what he’s done wrong - just that you don’t like him and you may be dangerous. This is not the way to create an unbreakable bond with your dog!

So why would you resist this simple solution to so many aggravations?

Don’t labour on like Jessica did, making housetraining, chewing, and life in general much, much harder. Use the tools that are available to you, just as most parents do with their small children. 

More info on how to crate-train happily here

And have a look at this complete system for your new puppy!

Where are my spoons? Why your dog runs out of calmness

It’s a puzzle to so many people. Their dog is easygoing and tranquil, and out of nowhere he snarks at another dog - or snaps at a child - or even growls at you! 

Maybe your dog is not so easygoing and you have just learned to live with these “random” outbursts. You never know when he’s going to be in a good humour, and when he’s going to have a meltdown.

But you CAN know! 

If you’re aware of what’s using up your dog’s patience stores, you’ll be able to manage him so that he doesn’t run out entirely, and be left with no way to go except have an outburst.

What you need to learn about is known as Trigger Stacking. And at the moment we have a huge extra trigger that many people simply aren’t aware of.

Heatwave!

In the UK at the moment we are enjoying (or suffering!) extreme weather. Weeks of temperatures in the high 70s and 80s (that's the high 20s in new money) - we’re not used to it at all!

So spare a thought for your dog, who has to wear his full fur coat regardless of the weather. 

You doubtless know all the commonsense advice for dogs and hot weather: 

• Ensure plenty of fresh water is available

• Brush out the winter coat as far as possible, and trim and shear hairy beasties

• Cut back on walks - maybe none at all for a few days, and certainly only at the cool ends of the day

• Limit access to the garden UNLESS you have a paddling pool to entertain your dog, or unless he has enough sense to find a shady spot and stay there

• Check temperature of the ground with your hand. Have you seen people doing the hoppy dance on a hot beach when they have no shoes on? 

• Don’t leave your dog in a car, even with the windows open, without taking measures to keep it cool. This will include covering all the windows, ensuring a through draught, running an aircon, and - of course - parking in the shade.

• Consider a cooling mat for a double-coated breed, or a cooling shirt. A wet t-shirt will work well too, but you need to keep wetting it.

• Frozen food-toys may be popular

• Observe speed of panting and shape of tongue - a long spoon-shaped tongue means your dog is working hard to get rid of heat 

Heatstroke in dogs can be quick, and deadly. So please take the precautions above to ensure your dog is protected.

Hothead

But you also need to consider how this heat is impacting his mental state.

I’d like you to take a quick detour and bone up on Spoon Theory. This explains so well how limited stores of energy have to be farmed and managed carefully. The same applies for our dogs with their limited store of tolerance. 

Before you even step out of the door on a hot day, your dog is stressed. He’s already used up a boatload of spoons and may be running critically low. This could apply to the calmer dog as well as the “reactive” or growly dog.

You know how quickly you can get annoyed when you're uncomfortable - especially if you're not used to the heat? Think of airport rows and road rage in hot traffic jams.

Lots of people will be out and about in holiday mode, with dogs who are only walked on high days and holydays, and everyone will be hot and bothered.

So seek out quieter walks, shaded walks - if you can find a place for your dog to swim, so much the better! - and cut out the ball-throwing till the worst of this heat is over. It will be over soon enough, and all us Britishers can go back to talking about the weather in disparaging terms! 

And if you live in a permanently hot place, you’ll have worked out your own ways of keeping your home cool, and strategies to get about outside without boiling. A reader from Texas told me that she can only take her dog out for 20’ at 5 am - after that it’s into the hundreds and impossible. 

 

Triggers, and spoons

Armed with this knowledge, you can now look at your dog in a different way. Hopefully a more understanding and tolerant way. He’s not being difficult - he’s struggling in circumstances he finds hard at the best of times, and may now be finding impossible.

In the greater scheme of things, it really doesn’t matter if your dog doesn’t go for a walk for several days - or even weeks. And contrary to what you may be thinking, you may be surprised to find that your normally hyper dog in fact gets calmer and more manageable, the less he’s walked!

Help him by managing his day carefully when outside influences are making it harder for him. He’s relying on you! 

 

Want to know more about keeping walks calm and pleasant? Whether your dog is “growly” or just a bit anxious on walks, you’ll find a lot to help you in this Free 5 Day Workshop

How training your dog can help you train people

Some people are good at greeting dogs. And some are … not. It’s not a skill we’re born with (think how long it takes to teach children how to greet people politely!), so we have to teach those who approach us how to greet our dog - or, indeed, whether they may greet her at all!

If your dog is like Greta Garbo, who famously said, “I want to be left alone,” then no greeting is required. This is where you’ll have to use your dog training skills to prevent a quick lunge from the visitor, now wailing “But dogs like me!” as they jump back alarmed from a snap.

You may have dogs who lurve people and want to jump all over them. Yapping NO at your dog, flapping your hands and yanking the lead is not going to cut it. You need to teach your ebullient dog how to greet strangers - and for this you need the stranger’s co-operation!

So how can you get the people you meet to comply?

You can use the same mantra we use for our dogs - 

Reward what you like
Ignore what you don’t like
Manage what can’t be ignored

This means that if your visitor does what you ask, they earn the reward of greeting your dog. If they do inappropriate things (in your dog’s eyes) then you ignore their efforts as you focus on directing them to what you do want, and manage the situation so they can’t interfere with your dog.

Let’s have a closer look at this.

The shy, anxious, or fearful dog

Evasion skills for your shy or worried dog

• Carwash - teach your dog to run behind you and appear peekaboo-style between your legs. Few strangers will grope between your legs to get at your dog
• Get behind - lurking behind your legs may work better for very large or very shy dogs
• Down - can get them out of arm’s reach of invasion
• Muzzle - If your dog has a tendency to lunge and snap, teach her to be happy in her muzzle. This will relax you as you’re not worried about damage, and does tend to keep people away. They think this dog is dangerous - in fact she’s safer than an unmuzzled dog

Where you can help

• Get between your dog and the kindly visitor intent on grabbing her
• Use your body to block the path to your dog, and keep moving as necessary to stay in the way
• Asking the would-be greeter questions and taking control of the meeting, will distract them from their “Hello doggy” plans
• Maybe just keep walking! With a quick “Morning!” as you pass
• Or use the tried and tested policeman STOP hand signal. This is immensely effective at stopping people in their tracks, giving you time to arrange your dog where you want her, and allowing you to compose a suitable sentence to keep the person at a comfortable distance. You don't have to make excuses for your dog. Just think of a quick way of getting the person to do what you want. Practice this at home with a friend, so you feel brave enough to do it!
• Talk to your dog quietly and politely - this may impress your would-be greeter that you don’t have to yell and grab this particular dog

The over-exuberant dog

If a meeting is appropriate, give clear instructions on how to greet your dog. You’ll train your dog how to do his part, using friends to help you. This means he’ll know this “game” when you want to use it in the wild.

Bouncy Goldie pup Alfie shows how to greet people

Greeting skills for a bouncy dog

• Hand touch (your hand to start with)
• Release cue (“Go say hi”, only when dog is sitting and calm)
• Timing of reward (when he’s turned back to you)

Your clear instructions should be brief and simple. For instance, “just hold your hand down by your side so he can sniff it”. This tends to stop people leaning over your dog and grabbing or patting, ruffling or thumping. It also stops your dog leaping up to nose-dot them as they can inspect their hand instead.

By the time your dog has sniffed the hand to gain all the information he needs about the person, he’s already back with you for his treat. Job done.

Crowd control

Unless you know for a fact that the person wanting to chat to you and your dog will listen to you, follow your instructions, and understand what you’re doing - don’t let them near enough to cause trouble.

All this work you’ve put in to understanding how your dog’s mind works and how to get the best from her? It’s just the same with people! You can take a quick overview of the situation, remember my mantra above, make rapid decisions about whether a greeting should or should not happen, and take control of the meeting.

This way you won’t be caught out by those who think they know more about your dog than you do, and avoid the embarrassment of muddy pawmarks on the person’s clothes … or worse.

Remember if your dog thinks she has to defend herself against this invasive person, she’ll be more alarmed about the next person you pass, and may even consider a pre-emptive strike (leap out and snap) to keep them away.

For more ideas about how to have peaceful and uneventful walks, join the FREE 5 Day Video Workshop for your Growly but Brilliant Family Dog

How to stop your dog damaging her stitches

At some stage in his or her life, your dog will need stitches. Could be for neutering, a gash or tear, or something more serious.  

Some dogs will lick obsessively at a wound. This causes skin changes, it inhibits healing, and can introduce infection. So it’s essential that the wound is allowed to heal without being licked and nibbled at.

Many years ago one of my dogs came back from the vet wearing a modified wastepaper bin on his head. They’d cut the base out of it, leaving nasty ragged plastic edges. While protecting the wound they had made in surgery, it created sore patches and cuts all around his neck where it chafed. 

Vets now use a ready-made collar which comes packed flat. This is known as an “Elizabethan” or “Buster” collar to attach to your dog’s own collar. These are large lampshade-type constructions which will fit any size dog. 

They annoy mightily, but they don’t do any damage. Except when the dog catches it in a doorway and it digs into his neck. Or gets food all over the edges. Or is unable to get a drink without spilling the water bowl.

For indoor use only

If your dog needs this to protect the wound, then go for it. But if he’s well enough to go for a walk with you, please take it off! It crashes into things, its appearance will cause problems with other dogs, and it distorts your dog’s hearing so that when you call he’ll head off in the direction he’s facing - as that’s where the sound seems to be coming from! 

If your dog is busy running around, sniffing, and being a dog, he won’t be licking his wound.

There are alternatives. I haven’t tried one, but there are cushion-type collars that are supposed to prevent the dog turning his head round to reach the wound. I guess these could be very effective, depending on the position of the wound, and the elasticity of the dog. For dogs who are able to turn and meet themselves coming back, this probably wouldn't work.

A t-shirt that covers the area may be quite enough. Depending on the size of your dog, you can put a child’s or adult’s t-shirt on him. Tie all the excess material in a knot over his rump, so he can still pee without getting in a mess. 

If your dog can’t leave the wound alone, then obviously the bonnet stays firmly on. 

Not just licking!

Another time when it’s essential is when the wound is on the face or head. A quick scratch with a powerful hind leg can do untold damage in seconds. Dogs never seem to do the minimum scratching necessary to relieve the irritation - they scratch for what seems a pre-determined period, by which time the stitches may all be ripped out. Keep your hat on!

Here's Coco doing his Buzz Lightyear impression ...

But I’ve found that often nothing at all is needed. If I’m watching over my dog I can interrupt any interest in the wound site. The techniques good vets use these days mean that the incision is often tiny and can have minimal stitches or staples or glue to hold it together. So you don’t get the pulling and tweaking you can get with lots of stitches.

Years ago a surgeon told me that they had reduced healing time in his wards dramatically by making the bandages impossible for the patient to interfere with - thus letting the healing take place unhindered - and by having a lounge between the different-sex wards where patients could mingle. This added interest gave them something else to focus on! 

You can do the same by ensuring your dog can’t get at the wound, and by giving him lots of other things to amuse him, including walks, or play in your garden, if appropriate and advised by your vet. Otherwise you can stick to “brain games” - searching, chewing, unwrapping, etc, or just plain ole companionship.

So try relieving your dog of the burden of the dreadful bonnet! You may find it’s only needed occasionally if at all.

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How Can Your Family Dog Teach Your Children Empathy?

“You have to share.” 

This is a concept we all want our children to learn. Preferably before they become known as the mean kid at playschool. 

Nagging your child whenever he has something - but wants to keep it to himself - is not the way we want to interact with our family. Being told to share can push a reluctant sharer the wrong way and increase his feelings that his possessions are being threatened.

And it can backfire. Witness toddler Connor who wanted a taste of his mother’s glass of wine. When told no, he gathered up all the authority a 2-year-old can muster and said, “You have to share.”

So, to dodge this particular minefield, how about bringing in a helper who will teach your child the joy of sharing without any pressure - or even parental input?

Your Family Dog!

There she is, waiting in the wings, always happy to oblige with a bit of company.

Careful introductions

You have doubtless put plenty of effort into ensuring that child and dog got off to a good start - starting early in pregnancy acclimatising your dog to baby gear, sounds, smells (see Resources below for help with this). 

Exposure to each other should be limited and always actively supervised. The child should never be allowed to badger the dog, and - of course - you never leave any child alone with any dog, not even for a moment, not even while you answer the phone. Always take one of them with you.

You’ll need to teach the dog a default  Leave it - check out the step-by-step book here - so that boundaries (toys, food, beds) are clear and there's no confusion. And your baby will need to learn the same trick! It’s part of learning respect for others and their space and things. 

Oh, and no cutesy pictures of the baby crawling on or hugging the dog please! A little study of Dog Body Language will show you how close many of these babes you see on the internet are to a bite.

Toddlers and older children

So, having carefully worked through all that, the pay-off is that your small child should already have a firm relationship with your dog, enjoying the fun she brings to play, and the comfort of a soft, fluffy friend to commune with when in need of company or reassurance.

You can encourage your child to include the dog in his plans. You can encourage him to think of her needs. 

• “What’s Maisie having for dinner?” Your child can help prepare her something he knows she likes, and learn to see to her needs before he gets his own supper.
• “Where’s Maisie going to sit?” you may ask when being shown a splendid “treehouse” in the hedge. This is probably just a muddy hole with some branches over it - but it’s an important construction! And there may well be a place for your dog built in to the plan already.
• “Shall we bring Maisie?” You can discuss how Maisie may feel about the proposed outing, and whether she’d be happier coming or staying at home. 
• “Do you think Maisie would like to be left alone to sleep now?” Oh how important this one is! Maisie has a right to her own privacy, and will need to sleep at least as much as your baby does. You can juggle the waking and sleeping times so that there are only very few times when both are active and need that constant supervision from you. An under-rested dog is just the same as a fractious overtired toddler - she can’t cope when she needs to be asleep and is being poked and prodded. Don’t test your dog’s patience!

Spontaneous Sharing

Sharing his treehouse, his games, his excitement, his sadness - and sometimes the food he doesn’t want to eat, secretly dropped into Maisie’s waiting mouth below the table - will give your small child a way to express himself and his feelings without the complications of human interactions or sibling competition. 

If he doesn’t want to feature the dog in one of his games or imaginings right now, then she’ll be happy to doze in her bed till she’s needed. No offence taken.

He will learn the pleasure of sharing in a simple, natural way - without us having to keep telling him.

Putting the dog’s needs first, helping her with the things she can’t do herself, and appreciating the things she can do so much better than he can - having her find lost shoes, for instance - will teach your child empathy faster than any other way I know.

The Darlings in Peter Pan had Nana. You have your own nursemaid. Put her to work for you!

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RESOURCES
Blue Cross  
Family Paws
Doggone Safe
Children and dog bites