“My dog is JUST stubborn!”

Now those of you who know me, will know that this statement is a bit of a red rag to me!

Dogs - and people - are not stubborn … unless they’re pushed into a corner and you try to make them do something they’re unhappy about.

Anyone who manages a team, a family, a group of co-workers, knows that to get people to do what you want, you have to make it worth their while.

And ideally that it should be their idea!

That’s the fastest way of all to get enthusiastic compliance.

So, you canny people, why do you expect your dog to be any different?

The dictionary tells us that

Stubborn is “having or showing determination not to change one's attitude or position on something, especially in spite of good arguments or reasons to do so.”

Shooting oneself in the foot, as it were.

And if someone is in this position, you have to ask yourself how they got there? What benefit is it for them?

Because there has to be a benefit, or they wouldn’t do it!

Facts? 

“I’ve made up my mind. Don’t confuse me with the facts.”

 All this is to say that it’s not the dog that’s being stubborn.

Wha’???

It’s up to us - who have the care and responsibility of an animal from another species - to ensure their wellbeing.

And that means

◆   not letting them race into the road to get run over

◆    not injuring themselves (and you) by trying to haul you along like a train

◆    not ingesting dangerous substances that could cost them their life, and you a fortune at the vet’s.

This is all at our door.

So we have to find a way to encourage our dog to comply with this basic training that is ultimately for their benefit (as well as ours).

And the way to do that is to give them a choice!

(You can see Red here making an excellent choice with regard to the sausage sandwiches on the table!)

Just as you do with your team, your family, your co-workers - you give them options and let them choose. Let’s box clever here: you decide the options.

And once they choose, they’ll stick with their decision and follow through - because they chose it!

Running a business like a boot camp is bound to fail. Running a family like that will engender rebellion and resentment and a rapidly-emptying nest.

So take the easy route!

Give your dog - who up to now you’ve labelled as “stubborn” - a choice in his management and daily life.

If you haven’t yet tried this, you will be astonished at the difference it makes!

You will have a dog who wants to please you, who looks for opportunities to please you, who takes the load off your shoulders by anticipating your requests.

No shouting! No yelling! No frustration!

And no “stubborn” dog!

If you don’t believe me - well, perhaps you don’t want to be confused by the facts …

Check out our free Workshop on Getting your Dog to LISTEN! first of all, and do comment below on how quickly this works for you!

5 Dog Breed Myths

1. Big dogs are hard to handle

2. All small fluffy dogs are cute

3. Rescues are better than pedigrees (or vice versa)

4. Doodles don't shed

5. Sighthounds can't recall

Well - you could call them “myths” - but I prefer to call them “excuses”! 

Because these things usually come out of the mouths of people whose dogs are in some way challenging them, so they have to produce a reason which doesn’t include the fact that they forgot to train their dog … or they have deluded themselves into getting the wrong dog for their home because of a misconception. 

Let’s take a look:

1. Big dogs are hard to handle

Back in my Working Trials days I didn’t do PD (Police Dog), but competed at plenty of trials where PD was being tested, so I got to know a fair few of the top handlers. The dogs are tested for their resilience, their tenacity, their instant responses, and their ability to bring down a criminal (without damaging him). 

I learnt a saying there when talking to a trainer whose Champion was quite a small collie, which applies to all animals - including people! Note that ‘fight’ here refers to the conflict or spirit - it’s nothing to do with dogs fighting.

“It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”

People can manage horses. People can manage elephants. People can manage all kinds of large animals. Big dogs can be handled just as easily. 

And a lot of people struggle to manage quite small dogs!

It’s all a question of switching things round from the concept of control, of dominance, to the fact that it’s all very easy if the dog wants to do what you ask.

This is the essence of Choice Training, and is what I teach throughout Brilliant Family Dog and all its books and programs.

2. All small fluffy dogs are cute

This is a nonsense put about by the ghastly puppy farms and ‘greeders’ who cater for the desire to have a fashionable fluffy to show off. 

These “designer dogs” are … dogs! And if they’ve had a poor start, as suggested in my sentence above, they’re going to be more difficult than they need to be.

Dogs come in all shapes, sizes, temperaments, and characters. It’s essential to work with the dog that’s in front of you, rather than the dog you wish you had.

“Cute is as cute does” as my mother would most certainly have said (if she’d ever used the word ‘cute’!). 

And yes, small fluffies can be cute. But so can big smoothcoats. And both have the potential to be less than cute. It’s all in how we teach them.

Back to Choice Training again!

3. Rescues are better than pedigrees (or vice versa)

This one’s just plain silly. A dog is a dog is a dog. He has no idea how he came to be on the planet. He just is!

And all dogs have a right to a good home and a good life. 

Choosing a dog of known breeding can certainly help if you want that dog for a specific purpose, and need evidence that the dog will be fit for that purpose both physically and mentally. But there are no guarantees! 

And it’s true to say that there is more variation between individuals than between breeds.

In other words - there’s an element of pot luck in choosing any dog! The only thing we can be sure of is how we treat that dog when he arrives.

Choice Training, anyone?

4. Poodle crosses don’t shed

More nonsense, I’m afraid. If you cross two animals, you’re going to get genes from both. Which genes are recessive and which dominant is in the lap of the gods.

You’ve only got to look at children in the same family - blue eyes / brown eyes, blonde hair / dark hair … 

So you can get a poodle cross that has no sign of poodle coat, and one which is very poodly. And all dogs lose hairs. So if you have a health reason for not wanting dog hairs in your home, a poodle cross is no guarantee.

5. Sighthounds don’t recall

I’ll let Cricket the Whippet answer this one for you in this brief video.

You can see the moment she clocks the rabbit and takes off - and you can see the enthusiasm with which she hurtles back!

And here’s another for you, where there’s no rabbit, but she really really hoped there would be, as there often are up this path - and she was alert and attentive in the hunt! 

Choice Training rules!

Want to learn more about Choice Training?

Check out our free Workshop here, on getting your dog to LISTEN!

Do You Dream Of Your Dog Flying Back To You Every Single Time You Call? Start Here!

First published on positively.com and reprinted here with permission

What would it mean to you if you could give one call, and your dog zoomed in and arrived at your feet? Every time!

Hard to imagine? Maybe.

Possible? Most definitely!

Fun? Very much so. (If it’s not fun, your dog won’t do it. So there’s lots of fun!)

Little by little

The problem is that many people think their dog comes with a recall installed.

No! Whether a puppy or a rescue, you’re getting Dog 1.0 - the basic version. Upgrades are installed through hours of fun and games, aka force-free dog training.

When your new little puppy arrives, you may be tempted to think she has a great recall because she quickly finds you. This is just her infant clinginess.

Like a lamb at foot, the young puppy tends to keep close to her minder. Once she starts to grow a bit, in confidence as well as in size, you’ll find that infant clinginess will evaporate.

And if that’s what you’ve been relying on, you are now up the creek without a paddle.

So you need to get in early, ensuring that you use that time when your puppy wants only to be with you, to build a thumping good recall. Naturally, with a puppy of a few weeks old you’re only going to teach through games!

The secret is to keep those games going as your dog gets older, so they will always choose you over the distraction they were about to hurtle towards.

Toddler and pup both doing great recalls. Illustration from "Here Boy!"

Old School training

In days gone by (thankfully), people didn’t start teaching dogs till they were six months old or so - the reason being they had to be tough enough to stand up to the harsh treatment meted out to them.

What a trick they missed!

All those early weeks and months when your puppy is like a sponge soaking up new information!

Why on earth let your pup run wild for months learning to do all kinds of things you don’t want her to do - then say, “Right, now I expect you to behave differently.”?

So with your new puppy, start the day she arrives.

With a new rescue dog you may have a lot of history to work against. The easiest way to achieve what you want is to imagine this is a new puppy and teach the exact same way.

First things first

There are two things you need to be clear on before you start:

1. If you don’t want your dog to do something, then don’t let it happen

So if you have any suspicion your dog may run off and not come straight back - highly likely in a new rescue dog - then you need to learn how to use a long line safely (not an extendable lead) while you teach your super instant recall.

This does not mean you never let your puppy off-lead! This will not teach her anything except to want to get away from you.

Your dog must be free in order to make a choice to come back. But only let her off-lead in an enclosed area. Gradually your dog will earn her freedom in larger areas.

2. Everyone on the planet listens to the same radio station: WII fm

WII fm? That’s “What’s in it for me?”

Your dog will be making a choice whether to hare after the distraction or shoot back to you. What’s in it for her?

You need to make your recall games such fun that her response becomes automatic. And an easy way to train in any kind of knee-jerk reaction - so that her recall goes onto auto-pilot - is to use rhythm and patterning in your games.

Step by step

When you were learning to read, you were not given a copy of James Joyce’s Ulysses and told to get on with it!

You were taught shapes of letters or words and their sounds, gradually slotting those jigsaw pieces together till you could hit a line of text running, read it and understand it.

So letting your dog wander off then calling her and expecting her to know what to do is just as mad as giving your toddler Ulysses.

The very first thing your pup needs to learn is that her name means good things, and only good things. You should never use your dog’s name if you are frustrated or annoyed with her. Any other word! - but not her name.

Rollo is happy to be racing back to me! An Illustration from "Here Boy!"

Here’s a simple game to get you started. Watch out for other family members as well as yourself. You may be surprised at how much negativity is being attached to your dog’s name on a daily basis!

1. Say dog’s name once

2. When she responds - by raising an eyebrow or hurtling towards you and crashing into your legs - reward her with something good

3. Repeat at every opportunity throughout the day

4. Enjoy your dog

What should her reward be? That’s something that you should be finding out if you don’t already know!

What does she like?

🐾  A run and laughter?

🐾  A piece of cheese?

🐾  A game with you and a toy?

🐾  A game of chase?

Whatever “is in it for her” is what you use to reward her response to her name.

One day her willing and instant response to her name may save her life. Be sure to take time building that response.

And for a step-by-step guide to a lightning-fast recall - every time - go and take a look at Here Boy! Step-by-step to a Stunning Recall from your Brilliant Family Dog, the fourth in the series of Essential Skills for a Brilliant Family Dog, available in ebook, paperback, and audiobook. Go now, and you can be reading it within minutes!

Picture this: your dog is racing towards another dog, you call her name - once - and she spins and races back to you at the same speed, arriving with a smile on her face and a happy waving tail, saying, “Didn’t I do well?”

This can be you and your dog!

Want to teach your dog to LISTEN?

Enjoy our free Workshop here

Five Ways to teach your dog that coming to you is the best thing ever!

If you want your dog to come when you call, you need to get into his head that arriving with you is the best thing ever! 

Instead of asking your dog to leave an exciting something to come to boring you, change his mindset so that he sees your call as an opportunity to spin on a sixpence and race straight to you like a missile.

20-week-old Rocco races to his owner at high speed!

And here are some NEVERS and some ALWAYS’s to keep you on the straight and narrow

1. NEVER, EVER, reprimand your dog when he comes to you. If he runs to you and you tell him off, how likely is it that he’ll come next time you call? It doesn’t matter what he did when he was “out there” - coming back to you has to be the best thing he ever did. Be sure he knows that his prompt return always makes you very, very happy!

2. NEVER go on a walk without a stash of really good treats in your pocket. ”Really good” does not include his kibble, cat biscuits, or pocket fluff. Rather - cheese, sausage, hot dog, beefburger … If you did a good turn for someone and they gave you a dry biscuit as a reward, how likely would you be to put your hand up next time they’re looking for a favour? A whole chocolate cake? Now that’s a different matter!

3. NEVER call your dog, and - when he doesn’t respond - say “Ah well, I’ll call him a bit later.” This has been noted, documented, and logged by your dog, and filed under the heading “I only need to come when I’m called sometimes.” This is the absolute last thing we want him to learn! He needs to know that when he hears his name, he comes back - every time.

4. ALWAYS vary your rewards. Sometimes he gets a lump of beefburger when he arrives with you; sometimes he gets 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 tiny bits of cheese posted into his mouth one after the other; sometimes you hurl his toy behind you as he approaches, then race him to the toy; sometimes as he runs towards you you take off at high speed away from him - game on! - dogs all love to chase! What else could you do to excite your particular dog?

Puppy Cai loves this recall game with his young owner

5. NEVER call him unless you have a 90% chance of him coming. Choose your moment, call him and refer to no.3 above. He doesn’t come? Then if the mountain won’t come to Mohammed, Mohammed must go to the mountain. Go up to him and call him from one yard away. Success! Big lump of sausage!

How soon should I start training my puppy to recall?

Immediately!

Straight away!

As soon as you get your new puppy or new dog, they should be learning that responding to their name is the best thing ever. Read this post to give you a start. 

Dogs love running fast. Make sure that running fast towards you is always more rewarding than running fast in the opposite direction.

It takes time and steady application to develop a super recall. But think how proud you’ll be when you can call your dog’s name (once!) and he stops dead, spins round, and hurtles back to you! And think how relieved you’ll be if he had been racing towards a road, or a sabre-toothed tiger (or whatever hazards you have in your neck of the woods).

Dog or Puppy problems? Get your free 8-lesson email course and solve them all painlessly!

THIS FREE ECOURSE IS A BONUS FOR YOU WHEN YOU SIGN UP TO RECEIVE EDUCATIONAL EMAILS AND OCCASIONAL OFFERS FROM ME. YOU CAN UNSUBSCRIBE AT ANY TIME.
Privacy Policy

Our family’s always had dogs, why is this one so difficult?

“Archie just goes mad,” said Anne.

“He’s so full of energy he doesn’t know what to do with himself. He’s always stealing things, getting on the chairs, he knows just how to wind me up  …

And then, when we go out, he’s not at all friendly with other dogs. Some children were rushing past on their scooters the other day - I thought he was going to grab them!

We’ve always had dogs - but I’ve never had one like this before! 

What’s wrong with him?”

This is a shame. Anne was very pleasant, well-meaning, and obviously devoted to the naughty Archie. When I visited her I saw the life that Archie lived and found the root of the problem fairly quickly.

Anne was indeed experienced with dogs. For forty years there had always been a family dog. 

Now she had the dog … but no family!

Her previous dogs had been brought up in the rough and tumble of family life. From morning till night (and sometimes during the night) there had always been activity. The electric energy children bring to a home was ever-present.

There would be visiting children, bikes to chase after, tears and jam to be licked off cheeks, shrieking, dropped food to be cleaned up, toys, gadgets, running and racing, tree houses to climb up into, a sick child to cuddle up with …

Free Puppy Socialisation Guide

Learn new force-free ways to teach your new puppy!

THIS GUIDE IS A BONUS FOR YOU WHEN YOU SIGN UP TO RECEIVE EDUCATIONAL EMAILS AND OCCASIONAL OFFERS FROM ME. YOU CAN UNSUBSCRIBE AT ANY TIME. Privacy Policy

Success! Now check your email to confirm your subscription.

There was an error submitting your subscription. Please try again.

First Name

Email Address

We use this field to detect spam bots. If you fill this in, you will be marked as a spammer.

I'd like to receive the free email course. Download your free guide We won't send you spam. Unsubscribe at any time. Powered by ConvertKit

Housekeeping in a busy family was basic maintenance, not perfection.

And then there were the school runs, walks to the shops, family holidays on the beach.

Archie’s predecessors had had a very different upbringing!

And Archie had missed out on all of this.

What Archie had missed

• He hadn’t learned to cope with children (Anne never walked to the shops these days and there were as yet no visiting grandchildren.)

• He did not encounter many dogs in the rural area Anne had retired to 

• The house was painfully quiet - and spotless. Anne was very, very houseproud. 

• He’d never been to puppy class (“The other dogs had never needed it,” said Anne, “so I didn’t bother.”)

• He didn’t know how to use up his energy in the day 

• He had plenty of long country walks which made him stronger, but his mind was never tired

• This was all exacerbated by the fact that Archie was a high-energy dog, bred to work till he dropped

So while Anne thought she was rearing her young dog the same way as her previous family dogs, in fact she was missing a huge chunk of his essential upbringing!

"I'm bored! If something doesn't happen soon, I'll have to make it happen!"

In this case we started a program of belated socialisation and habituation, Archie came to class and was very quick to learn the games and tricks I teach there, and Anne learnt that mental stimulation is infinitely more tiring than physical exercise!

You cannot “socialise” an older dog. This is something that can only happen in the dog’s brain up to the age of 15-16 weeks. What you can do is get him out and about, having new experiences, and enjoying them! If he’s not enjoying - for instance another dog walking towards him - then about turn and withdraw to a safe distance where he can observe the dog passing while you pop treats into his mouth. The distance will vary, but could be at least 50 yards. 

Anne didn’t need to take Archie on ever longer walks, building his stamina so that his energy was boosted - just spend a few minutes here and there during the day when she could play some of the games and tricks he’d learnt in class, and mind games to satisfy his busy brain. Here's a great book to get you started.

As a working dog, Archie quickly took to the games which involved his amazing powers of scent. Hide and Seek, in the house and the garden, became very popular! We even taught Archie some useful tricks: fetching Anne’s indoor shoes when they arrived back from a walk was very popular all round. It gave Archie a job to do straight away, and Anne was able to dry his feet when he brought her shoes, before he’d started running all over the house. 

Family Dog but no family?

Children go so well with puppies!

So if you're like Anne - you want to get another family dog but don’t have the family at home any more, here are a few things to consider:

• Early socialisation to everything in our world is vital. This includes towns, shops, countryside, schools, fairs, horses, bikes, trains, dogs, children, etc. “Early” means from the day after your puppy arrives, at 8 weeks.

• A first-rate force-free Puppy Class will give you lots of tools and experience

• Mental stimulation is more tiring and satisfying than physical exercise alone. This was a big surprise to Anne!

• Playing with your dog is much more fun than telling him off

• Care less about the spotlessness of your home - you have a dog!

• Choose a breed that was not designed to run over moor and mountain for eight hours a day

• Worry less about what your dog is doing, and more about what you are doing

Most of all, enjoy your puppy!

Dog or Puppy problems? Get your free 8-lesson email course and solve them all painlessly!

THIS FREE ECOURSE IS A BONUS FOR YOU WHEN YOU SIGN UP TO RECEIVE EDUCATIONAL EMAILS AND OCCASIONAL OFFERS FROM ME. YOU CAN UNSUBSCRIBE AT ANY TIME.
Privacy Policy

Trust your dog, don’t control him!

Lizzie had recently retired from a responsible position. 

She lived in a spotless and perfectly-kept home in the countryside with a husband who was always out at work. She wanted a dog for companionship and pleasant country walks.

Her children were long grown so it was a good while since she’d had a young thing to look after. 

So the advent of her puppy Bracken brought up all kinds of fears and anxieties in Lizzie - she was terrified something dreadful would happen to him, but she also struggled with the disruption a puppy brought to a neat, clean, adults-only, house.

At Puppy Class, Bracken was distracted and lively - typical of his busy and active breed - not, perhaps, the best choice for a first-time dog-owner of later years. 

Lizzie got very anxious and embarrassed by his behaviour at class. 

Get your free email course to learn how to change things kindly and without force!

THIS FREE ECOURSE IS A BONUS FOR YOU WHEN YOU SIGN UP TO RECEIVE EDUCATIONAL EMAILS AND OCCASIONAL OFFERS FROM ME. YOU CAN UNSUBSCRIBE AT ANY TIME.
Privacy Policy

She felt ashamed that she couldn’t “control” this puppy, and felt he was showing her up. 

She was perplexed that her image of the perfect dog trotting at her heels across hill and dale was not matched by the reality of a puppy who seemed to be always straining to get as far away from her as possible!

So I wasn’t surprised when Lizzie got in touch with me a couple of months after her Puppy Course finished to give me a long list of problems she was having with Bracken, and to ask for help.

Enter the prison!

When I arrived at her home I found something more akin to a prison! I was ushered through an airlock of two doors at the front door (a good practice in itself) to see an excited puppy leaping up at a baby gate. Bracken was not learning how to greet people stuck behind a gate!

She had four metal playpens barricading various rooms and corridors. She had baby gates in most of the doorways - this in addition to a couple of crates. And outside she had had fencing built round the patio to prevent Bracken’s access to the garden.

The house itself was spotless, with no sign of Bracken’s toys which had all been put away. 

Her focus was entirely on containing and controlling her eager youngster.

Her list of problems included:

• Bracken was not yet reliably housetrained

• He’d grab anything he could find in the house and initiate a chase game

• Outside he’d get hold of stones and slugs, which Lizzie frantically tried to get off him

• This was leading to a Resource Guarding problem

• He’d steal any food so everything was locked away

• He’d race off to any dog he saw on walks, play too roughly, and refuse to come back

The Program

This is what made Lizzie happy!

• I revised with Lizzie the games she’d learnt in Puppy Class - which had all been forgotten in the new clampdown era

• I taught her new games - particularly for focus and recall - to show her that Bracken could keep his feet on the floor and engage intelligently with her

• We played fast games so Bracken could learn to respond even while highly excited

• Housetraining - we went back to new puppy basics

• She revised her matwork with Bracken so he could reliably go to his mat when asked - and stay there till released

• She learned to swap, not to snatch or chase. This stopped the stealing and the resource guarding, and dealt with the potentially dangerous slug ingestion

• Lizzie learned to stop caring about stolen items so that grabbing stones was no longer the prompt for a chase game for Bracken, so it just died out on its own

• She improved Bracken’s diet, going for a grain-free option

• She learned how to handle a long line with soft hands so she could give Bracken comparative freedom without getting too anxious herself

• She got a Freedom Harness for control without coercion

• These both improved her Loose Lead Walking dramatically

• We worked on a system for greeting dogs and people with self-control

• She polished up her Tug play from class so that it incorporated masses of impulse control along with masses of high energy fun

• She did some work using Dr. Overall’s Relaxation Protocol to teach Bracken to self-soothe and settle

• And she started to use impulse control at every opportunity - every time she opened the fridge, every time she opened a door, picked up a toy or Bracken’s lead

The result

Over the course of a month - with much reassurance that Yes, Lizzie was an excellent owner for Bracken, and Yes, she could look after him well and give him what he needed, and Yes, he would become her perfect companion over time - all the playpens, fences, and gates disappeared. 

She became able to walk him on a loose lead instead of the vice-like grip on a tight lead she had before, and she was able to let him loose on walks without panicking that he’d escape (or even want to escape). 

She had entirely stopped chasing Bracken for stolen items, with the result that he no longer bothered to steal them - he’d much rather have the offered game instead.

Housetraining? “Oh yes, he’s fine now!”

The Conclusion

Bracken was a grand little pup who was being wound up on a daily basis with constant nagging, recriminations, and control.

He was simply exhibiting puppy and early adolescent behaviours which provoked a huge over-reaction in Lizzie, owing to her anxiety that she was somehow failing the dog.

Once Lizzie learnt how to relax and release - and to stop worrying herself into a panic - everything started to run smoothly.

By relinquishing control and instead giving Bracken choices, she elicited really good responsive behaviour from him. 

It was a delight for me to see that both Lizzie and Bracken felt free to trust and enjoy each other. The journey could now begin!

Get your free email course to learn how to change things kindly and without force!

THIS FREE ECOURSE IS A BONUS FOR YOU WHEN YOU SIGN UP TO RECEIVE EDUCATIONAL EMAILS AND OCCASIONAL OFFERS FROM ME. YOU CAN UNSUBSCRIBE AT ANY TIME.
Privacy Policy