dog companion

Is Don’t-based Training Still Prevailing with Dogs as well as Children?

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This article was first published at Medium.com

Dogs are at their most creative, and learn best, during play.

The scientists have proved this beyond a shadow of a doubt. The case is closed. And that’s why you’ll find that more and more organisations who work with dogs are switching from aversive methods of training to play-based methods, in the teeth of tv personalities with outdated ideas.

Guide Dogs, Search and Rescue dogs, Seizure Alert dogs, Hearing dogs for the deaf, Assistance dogs, performance dogs in Agility, Flyball, Dancing dogs, have for quite some time been trained to do their remarkable work as part of a big game.

Now even some enlightened police dog trainers — an area where dark training traditionally took place — are joining in and teaching through Do-based training instead of Don’t-based training.

You always used to hear police dog trainers say things like, “My life is on the line — I need my dog to be bombproof,” to excuse the harsh methods often employed. Now they’re realising that their dog’s response is not just as good as previously, it’s sharper, faster, more enthusiastic, just plain better.

And who wouldn’t prefer to work through fun and games rather than bullying and punishment?

Dogs are simple and uncomplicated creatures who do what works. If jumping through hoops, figuratively speaking, is fun, and they get a great reward for doing it, and — critically — they have a choice whether to do it or not, you’ll get ready and willing compliance, with sparkling performance.

Great news for dogs! But how are children faring?

What about our Children?

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So why are so many people stuck in the Dark Ages when it comes to dealing with their children?

There are, of course, plenty of educational establishments and organisations who pioneer fun methods of learning. There are schools which are beacons for the latest in learning theory.

I’m thinking more about what I see on the street, in the shops, in the park.

Many parents are still stuck in adversarial training. They lead with their chin. Everything becomes an issue. They lose sight of what they want to achieve and focus on what they take to be their child’s resistance. It’s a kind of old-fashioned manager vs employee approach — which is doomed to failure. Any small successes are hard-won and grudgingly ceded by the resentful subject.

Unless people are educated into understanding how to get the best results from people, from children, from dogs, they tend to default to the parade-ground style of barking commands and expecting instant, mindless, compliance. They can treat their nearest and dearest, as well as their pets, in ways they wouldn’t dream of treating a visitor!

Imagine saying to your house-guest: “Take a seat. Sit down. Sit! SIT! Get in that chair now!” Of course you wouldn’t do that.

But how many times do you hear similar things being barked at children, most usually expressed in the negative: Don’t, Stop, Cut it out, Put it down, Leave it alone, Not another word, Don’t touch.

No attempt is made to direct the child to what you actually want him to do!

Back to Dogs again

And this is exactly what people tend to do with their dogs. Their sweet new puppy, who just loves life, is seen as The Opposition. He must be contained, prevented, controlled, stopped.

And when this inevitably doesn’t work, the second-to-last resort is surgical intervention, in the totally mistaken belief that this will somehow render their dog acquiescent and malleable.

The last resort is, of course, off-loading the troublesome hound to the nearest shelter.

Who’s Watching?

A lot of this is a result of social pressure. The shouter feels the need to appear in charge — of his flock, his family, his employees, his dog.

Forgetting that anyone else is watching, and just focussing on the interaction between you and your child or dog - all the time keeping your eyes on what outcome you are actually looking for - can do wonders to the relationship.

The scientists are beavering away to prove, over and over again, how choice-based training gets the quickest results. Let’s listen to them and apply it in our own personal laboratory.

Let’s collectively move from “Don’t” to “Do”.

Is your dog or your little puppy throwing up more challenges than you anticipated? Watch our free Workshop and find how to change things fast!

 

 

 

Celebrate your Dog while you still have her

Brilliant Family Dog is committed to improving the lives of dogs and their harassed owners. Understanding our dog is crucial to building the kind of relationship we want with them. It’s too easy to take them for granted …  | FREE COURSE | #growlydog…

This article was first published at Medium.com

Many people are shattered by the loss of their dog. People reveal the depth of their feelings and their desolation at the sudden absence of their friend. The strength of these feelings can come as a bit of a surprise.

Our dogs creep up on us. Too late we realise how far they have tunnelled into our lives, our beds, our hearts, our souls.

 

As with any loss there can be feelings of regret: all those times I was too lazy to play with her; when she made do with scraps because I’d forgotten to prepare her food; when she missed out on a walk because it was raining; when I came home exhausted from my fulfilling day to my lonely dog — and then was too tired to give her a little of my time.

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Your dog commits totally to you. And in return we can take her for granted.

 

But She’s Just a Dog

I think that we often underestimate our dog’s intelligence and ability to reason. It’s very easy to bark commands at her and expect her to know what on earth it is that we want.

But how often are our expectations of what we want her to do unmatched by time spent on teaching her those things? We expect her to arrive with human-world behaviour installed, or to learn it by osmosis.

How unfair we can be!

It’s a truism that a trained dog is a happy dog. But it’s also the case that an untrained dog is a very confused dog.

How hard it can be for our dogs to continually try to guess what will please us; guess what will annoy or frustrate us and cause our displeasure — which hurts them so much!

She doesn’t have the whole world to love — she just has you.

I insure against some of the pain of the loss of a dog by having plenty of them! I usually have three or four and am always planning the next puppy. If I could have only one dog, I’d be thinking ahead to the next one. I couldn’t live without that joy and beauty in the household for long.

And the more dogs who spend their lives with me, the more I can see how totally individual and different they are.

 

Brilliant Family Dog is committed to improving the lives of dogs and their harassed owners. Understanding our dog is crucial to building the kind of relationship we want with them. Learning what makes your dog tick is the answer …   | FREE COURSE | …

Your Dog is a Teacher as well as a Learner

We can teach our happy-go-lucky, outgoing, everybody’s-my-friend dog some calmness and moderation, and we can encourage our shy, diffident dog to venture forth and gain confidence, but the dog’s character will remain.

Through years of living with several dogs at a time, my takeaways are:

  • Your appearance does not matter. Sometimes it’s puzzling if someone takes against you because of the colour of your hair or the length of your nose. But that’s their problem. Your dog is not going to change his hair colour for anyone. Neither should you.

  • Other people’s opinion is not of much interest. If you want to roll in the muck and they don’t understand, that’s their loss. Be proud of who you are.

  • Take every opportunity to rest and regroup.

  • If someone encroaches on your personal or psychological space, just move away. Dogs are in the main all for a quiet life.

  • Enjoy every moment and live in the present. It doesn’t matter if you’re cold and wet later — leap in the pond now!

  • Never tire of telling your special people that you love them.

 

They don’t live long enough — that’s for sure!

Yet they give so much.

Let’s give our dogs our time and attention now, in the few short years they’re with us. If we build our relationship to the fullest, we won’t be astonished by the gap they leave when they die, nor be filled with regrets at having failed them.

 

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